Weight: Goal +21 Didn’t gain, but didn’t lose either
Energy levels: Bleh!
Diet: I baked last week, so not very good. Damn you cupcakes! Damn you!! As I get increasingly upset by how little I’ve done, I find myself turning to food as a comfort more and more. I know that this is wrong, stupid and self-defeating, which makes me feel worse and so the cycle continues. Cue tiny violin.
Exercise: Er, none.
General comments: Another week in which I did pretty much nothing to reach my fitness goals. This has left me feeling really guilty and depressed and has started something of a downward spiral. You would think that feeling this way would get me to the gym (which I know would make me feel better on so many levels), yet it doesn’t. I’m trying really hard to fight the feeling and just get up off my bum but its So Hard. I wish I could understand why! Its so easy to get into bad habits, but so very very hard to start good ones. And restarting is so much more difficult than starting in the first place. Its pretty upsetting to see that I’m already into week 4 and nothing has changed. I find that as I lie in bed at night (while sleep evades me) I keep asking myself the same questions. What am I afraid of more, success or failure? Change, or staying in this physical rut? My actions so far are indicating that success and change are the big issues for me, but I am yet to figure out why. Like I said last week, perhaps a therapist would be a better investment that the gym membership… Let me know if you’ve managed to answer these questions for yourself. And how you did it.
I am concerned that putting this little exercise (or lack thereof) in the public domain is hindering my progress instead of helping. Instead of feeling accountable I end up feeling guilty. I’m also worried that its turning into a bit of a whine and excuse fest, so I’m using this week’s update as a call for support. If you’re doing/have done something similar please comment and let me know how you keep yourself motivated.
I’m just so Bored with a healthy diet and exercise being such major issues in my life. I want to skip forward to a time where they’re just a part of my routine and lifestyle. But the route to get there just keeps eluding me.
On the up side, my neighbour has kindly agreed to be my walking buddy and we have already done a 4.6km walk. Win! But that’s a story for next week. Hopefully this is the start of an upward trend.
Stay tuned for week 4, due Sunday, 13 February 2011!
GAWD! I totally relate. My inner dictator shouts so loudly, telling me how useless I am while my inner wild child tells me (very convincingly) that what I deserve for all my hard work/ great parenting/ not shouting at my mother – is a peanut butter sandwich or 7.
I read a great book called the 4 Day Win by Martha Beck (of Expecting Adam fame) and it really really helped give me a language to think and talk about what I was going through.
Deprivation is never going to work for me. I am now 8 months into a healthy weight process and its going okay. its slow, but its constant and I am not feeling resentful or deprived.
You can do this!
Good luck.
s
I’ve been at it so to speak since mid-September last year. Even know it is not easy to get exercising at 20:30 when the family is in bed. My eating habits are much better though and I must admit giving up Coke was surprisingly easy for an addict such as myself. Admittedly, I migrated to Coke Zero for a while and now drink (mostly) water with the occasional Coke Lite just to get some sore of fizzy drink in me body.
I understand what you’re going through. Just tonight after my session my body just does not feel as energetic as it normally does. Figured I’ve hit a plateau and need to spice things up (on an exercise level mind you :p). Just remember that we in this together. C’mon, let’s go team!