Weight: Goal +21 (yes, I Gained)
Energy levels: Average. Not as many afternoon naps, but I can’t say I was brimming with energy either. And illness on Friday and Saturday had me in bed for most of the time.
Diet: Not Good. Let’s leave it at that.
Number of times I made it to the gym: Not Once.
General comments: Week 2 was completely and utterly dismal on the weight loss front. Not even a bout of gastro helped drop the numbers on the scale. I seriously considered not updating (or just lying) today – hence the delay. But in the end I decided that the person I’d really be lying to would be me. So here I am, being honest.
I can’t figure out why I am so clearly and obviously sabotaging this. Especially since I did so well last year. I mean really, it isn’t that hard to get to the gym or eat the right food. And I always enjoy it/feel better when I do. So what’s up?
I have no idea. All I know is that, this week, losing all of this weight seemed like too big of a challenge for me and has left me depressed and demotivated. To be honest, I’m not sure which came first. Did the depression lead to the poor diet and gym avoidance, or did the cookies and lack of exercise lead to the depression. All things considered, it was probably a combination of the two.
Now I am ashamed and embarrassed, which doesn’t do great things for my motivation levels. I’ll try not to use that as an excuse this week but I’m not feeling too confident. I had great plans to be shopping for a new dress (in a new size) for my 32nd birthday which is in a week and a half’s time. Instead, it looks like I’ll be whipping out the fat jeans and a baggy t-shirt.
Maybe I should be paying a therapist instead of gym membership fees, because this week is starting on a dark note…
Anyway, stay tuned for week 3, due on Sunday, 6 February 2011. Let’s see how things pan out.
